Awesomely Bad Late 80's/Early 90's Rap Themes For Blockbuster Movie Sequels

Thursday, June 5, 2008

This morning over breakfast I somehow got on the topic of MC Hammer's "Addams Family Rap," a song I remember LOVING from my childhood. (Yes, at 7am these are the topics I often wish to discuss- feel free to celebrate and/or mourn the fact that I'm not having YOUR baby) In 1991, when the song came out, I was 9 and my brother was 11. He owned the cassette single and we played it over, over, over and over again, ad nauseum. I even have a clear mental image of my brother doing some sort of Uncle Fester dance that was sort of like the Thriller dance but way more awkward.

There is basically nothing about this that I don't love.

The Addams Family Rap was just one of many, MANY awesomely cheesy movie raps from the 80's/early 90's, all suspiciously made for blockbuster sequels to already popular movie franchises. Rap was crossing over into the mainstream and suburban white kids everywhere desperately wanted a (wholesome, watered down) piece.



Ninja Rap by Vanilla Ice, brought to us in the second Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, Turtles in Time- ALSO from 1991 (what a great year!). I was in third grade at this time, and that year my class just happened to have a talent show. I did a self choreographed dance to "Prisoner" by Mariah Carey with a friend wherein I wore white lace footless tights under a denim jumper (yes, really). The cool boys in class, decked out in sideways hats, lip synched their way through "Ninja Rap." They also did some sort of move while "rapping" that was similar to the Arsenio Hall "woof woof" movement. I have video proof of this event. Mike, Mike, Greg and Geoff- do yourselves a favor and never run for president.



Arguably the best, probably because it was done by Run DMC, is the "Ghostbusters Rap" from Ghostbusters II, which I proudly admit is one of my favorite movies of all time. This movie came out in 1989, which (I think- correct me if I'm wrong) makes this song the PIONEER of the cheesy rap themes for sequels genre. Not QUITE as awesome as breaking down the barrier between mainstream rock and rap, but an important contribution just the same, yes?

Honorable mention goes to Prince's "Batdance," disqualified both because it wasn't made for a sequel and also isn't a rap so much as... a horrifying, seven minute fever dream.



<3 siiigh. Have I mentioned yet today how much I love that little purple pervert? I honestly could watch his masturbatory guitar solos all day.